REVIEW : MACHETE

MACHETE

You knew it was only a matter of time. After the epic trailer for Machete appeared tagged to the front of Robert Rodriguez’ Grindhouse entry Planet Terror, we all knew that Hollywood would try and suck the life out of the trailer that made you put on your deepest trailer voice and spout the name ‘Machete’ to any slightly relevant situation. But could Machete ever work as more than just a trailer? And as the uncle in Spy Kids... Obviously.

When immigrant Machete (Danny Trejo) is hired to assassinate a corrupt politician, he soon finds himself being double-crossed and in the line of fire himself. But as the trailer famously states “If you hire Machete to kill the bad guy, you better make damn sure the bad guy isn’t you”. We now follow Machete as he attempts to get his revenge on the men who betrayed him.

Its all very familiar stuff, we’ve seen it hundreds of times before and not just recently, every action film in 70’s had vaguely the same plot. But where Machete shines through, is that it knows this and is winking at you almost every step of the way. The look and feel of the film have you convinced at times that this film could have been made some 40 years ago.

There are some great appearances from Rodriguez favourites like Trejo, and Cheech Marin as well as some great performances by A-Lister’s like Michelle Rodriguez, Jessica Alba and amazingly Lyndsay Lohan who, along with her mother, gets tapped by Machete himself. Drop in Seagal and De Niro and you have a roster to cream your jeans over.

Its all insane and for some reason the only way I think that most of us will accept someone as ‘Interesting’ looking as Trejo getting it on with some the most beautiful women in the Hollywood. But insane as it is, its all just good fun and takes you on a ride that you won’t soon forget.

 OVERALL

Machete is a thrill ride from bloody beginning, including a pistol being hidden in the least obvious of places, to the crazy Immigrant Lord Of The Rings Battle that sees us out. With plenty of sex, violence and bad language sprinkled along the way Rodriguez has done it again.